Do they really need help to breed?
Customer du jour:
This didn't, thank heavens, happen to me. I really don't think I could have kept a straight face. As it was, I had to turn around and pretend to straighten some books.
So the other cashier calls the next customer to her line. This customer was unaware of the fact that the mullet was a bad idea in the 80s and was an even worse idea now. The one she was sporting was somewhat grungy looking, and just set off the stud in one ear, the oversized T-shirt, and the cut-off shorts. The latter are usually a very bad idea, and they are especially unwise if one is slightly over five feet tall and slighty over a hundred pounds overweight.
Cashier to customer: "So, did you find everything all right today?"
Customer: "I think so, but if this doesn't work, can I return it?"
Cashier: "Yes, (recites return policy)."
Customer: "Good. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to find books on rat breeding!"
Cashier: (stunned) "Er, did you try Petco?"
Customer: "Yeah, but they didn't have any. I'm starting a rat-breeding business, and I want to get some books on it."
Cashier: (speechless) "Ah."
Customer: "Yeah, I figure that I'd make a lot of money breeding rats. They're really cute!"
Me: (walks into the gifts section, lest my shaking shoulders give me away)
Egads. And I always thought of rats as vermin that one stayed away from and sicced one's animals on if one was unfortunate enough to meet such a creature. If you want rats, lady, go to New York City. According to a recent census (and I don't want to know how that was done or who did it) the rats in the city outnumber the humans TEN TO ONE. I'm sure New York could spare a few. For that matter, why not get some roaches while you're at it?
(shakes head, wonders why certain portions of humanity are allowed out without keepers)